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How to Survive Mother's Day without your Mom

Mon, May 05, 2025

Mother’s Day is everywhere—cards in the stores, brunch reservations, picture-perfect posts—and for many, it’s a day filled with celebration. But if you’ve lost your mom, the day can feel like a sharp reminder of what’s missing. 

My own beloved mom, Ren, passed 15 years ago from glioblastoma and while the passage of time does help a little, Mother's Day continues to be a difficult day for me. 

Whether your own loss is recent or many years ago, grief has a way of resurfacing in waves—especially on days like this. You are not alone, and there is no “right” way to get through it. But here are a few ways that might help you carry your grief with a little more gentleness.


2. Let Yourself Feel Everything

You don’t need to hold it together or “be strong” today. If you feel sadness, anger, numbness, peace, or even laughter through tears—it’s all valid. Grief is deeply personal, and whatever you're feeling is more than okay.


2. Create a Personal Ritual

Honor your mom’s memory in a way that feels right to you.

  • Light a candle in her name.
  • Write her a letter and tell her what’s on your heart.
  • Visit a place that reminds you of her.
  • Eat her favorite meal.
  • Watch her favorite movie.

It doesn’t have to be grand—just meaningful to you.


3. Log Off If You Need To

Social media can feel overwhelming on days like this. Seeing post after post of people celebrating their moms can be painful. I try to stay off social media the whole week leading up to Mother's Day for this reason.

If you need to take a break, do it. Protect your peace however you can.


4. Honor Her in Spirit

Maybe it’s cooking her favorite meal, donating to a cause she cared about, or planting something beautiful in her memory. These small acts can be powerful ways to feel connected to her and to carry on her legacy. 


5. Talk About Her

If it feels right, share stories. Say her name. Let others know what made her special. Talking about your mom can bring comfort, and it reminds people that while she may be gone, she is still deeply a part of you.


6. Lean on Others

Whether it’s a friend who gets it, a grief support group, or a quiet text to someone who knows this pain—don’t be afraid to reach out. You don’t have to carry this alone and those who love you don't want you to carry it alone. 


7. Be Incredibly Gentle With Yourself

If all you do today is make it through the day, that’s more than enough. Grief is a reflection of love—and it takes courage just to feel it.

Do you have other suggestions for those out there going through this? Please feel free to comment below with your advice. 

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